I’m about to start my 12 week paternity leave next week thanks to a state program and almost everyone that I’ve told has had their jaws on the floor that I would even want to do that.
Today I witnessed a group of coworkers almost bragging how little time they took after their kids were born. I’ve heard stuff like “Most men are hard working and want to support their families so they don’t take leave”.
To me it was a no brainer, I’m getting ~85% of my normal pay and I get to take care of my wife, our son and our newborn for 3 whole months. and for someone who hasn’t taken a day breathe in the past 3 years I think I deserve it.
I’m in the US so I know it’s a “strange” concept, but people have seemed genuinely upset, people it doesn’t affect at all. Again, it’s a state program available to almost anyone who’s worked in the past 2 years, I’ve talked to soon to be dads who scoffed at the idea and were happy to use a week of pto and that’s it.
I feel like I’m missing something.
You are experiencing gender based persecution. Think of men who can’t be a stay at home dad, work as a nurse, or can’t show emotion, etc. Women who want to do construction work or STEM. LGBT and especially trans discrimination is also that taken to an extreme because the perceived gender divergence is more drastic. For whatever reason, there are many people in society who want to enforce strict artificial gender roles on other people.
My wife said something like “the patriarchy hurts everyone, men included” and everything made a lot more sense.
Yep don’t let the gender police stop you from being a good father and husband. You will never get another chance with them at that important life stage again, or such a long paid break to spend time with them. I don’t know who decided avoiding your family and working to enrich a company instead is manly when you are paid either way.
Out of curiosity, where do you live? If you live in a conservative state, that explains a lot about the scoffing and the dismissal of the unfamiliar and new by your peers.
Anyway, screw the haters. They are the ones who will regret missing out on those privileged pay from paternity leave.