The Stoned Hacker

Just passin’ through

  • 3 Posts
  • 60 Comments
Joined 2 years ago
cake
Cake day: June 24th, 2023

help-circle
  • Definitely hang out with people and try to have fun, it’ll help take your mind off things and begin to remind you who you are outside of the relationship.

    But I’m curious why going on a walk with a friend in nature would be cheating? Hanging out alone with someone of the gender(s) you’re attracted to isn’t cheating. While everyone has different definitions of cheating I think most would agree that violating your partner’s boundaries around sexual, emotional, or romantic intimacy is usually what constitutes cheating; hanging out with a friend in a purely platonic way isn’t cheating and if your partner made you think so that’s a bit of a red flag in my opinion.


  • Exist in and feel those emotions, and then let them go as much as you can. As others have said, time will heal this wound. Don’t run into the arms of someone else or try to numb this pain; it’s important you feel it. Rushing into another relationship will only bury this pain by putting you in an unhealthy situation; numbing it will only lead to bad decisions and possible substance abuse. Let yourself feel this way, as horrible as it feels, and understand that it won’t be forever.

    You will be okay, and to be honest you will probably be more than okay. In a period that seems impossibly long now but laughably short at the end of this, you will become a better, stronger, and healthier person with a greater capacity to love and the wisdom of who better to give that love to. It is difficult, but you will survive. And then you will thrive. Love yourself and ride this out. You got this.




  • In elementary/middle school at a small Catholic school in a progressive major North American city, it was a week or two where we got some workbooks and were separated by sex (this was as gender discussions were beginning to hit the mainstream). They were fine, they were certainly informative and educational and didn’t lie. I do recall them focusing on abstinence but it was mostly about the biology and family planning iirc.

    I then went to the largest public high school in my city. Freshman year we had a health class and an entire unit was focused on sexual health. We learned about different contraceptive methods and their efficacy, STIs (had to do group presentations on them), the biology and in/outs of reproduction, sexual and gender orientation (iirc), the legality of things and actions and some stuff about consent (as a kink practitioner and queer person, I would’ve liked more but it’s probably a lot more than most have ever learned about consent), and things along those lines. We were also given resources and our teacher was super nice and helpful about this stuff.

    We also learned about drugs, the different types of drugs, their effects, withdrawals, and risks. It was municipally mandated, if not state mandated, educational content so it was standardized at least across the city, but I kinda doubt it’s taught as equitably as it was in my high school. But it was incredibly comprehensive and extremely educational. While I still made a lot of mistakes as a dumb horny teenager, did things i shouldn’t have, and got hurt/hurt people by being a dumb horny teenager (no SA/SH), it prepared me very well for my experiences and set me up to be the safe and respectful person I am today (who knows how to safely disrespect you when you ask nicely <3)




  • I think that this is a very balanced and thoughtful take that I agree with. As someone who has been smoking daily for the better part of 4 years now, weed has helped a lot but it has also hurt me a lot. At my peak i could easily kill a quad a day, although now I’m down to a gram a day if that. I would’ve been in a much better position financially if I never started smoking, and I’m sure my health would’ve been a lot better. That being said, smoking has helped me through some very difficult times and has given me community. I started smoking in highschool but stopped until I graduated and started again right before college. I’ve stopped having my own supply at points (not stopped smoking altogether but gone mostly sober), but especially in this day and age it’s very helpful to have it. It doesn’t help that where I am, a lottttttt of people are cali sober (me included).

    ++






  • Sprinkle cat litter after you shovel and salt, it’ll provide traction and prevent ice from reforming. You can get one good and warm set of winter clothes, or you can do a fuckton of layers. The former is simpler but can leave you with less flexibility and will probably be more expensive than wearing 3-5 layers of clothes you probably already own. If you don’t have them, long johns/thermal pants are a godsend. Gloves and a hat that covers the ears are also godsends, but if you’re willing to tough it out (and maybe lose a few extremities) you can do without them as eventually you’ll stop feeling the sting. Tuck your shirt and/or jacket into your pants, this will trap heat. Tuck your gloves into your coat or vice versa. Get good boots, i cannot stress this enough. It is not fun or a good idea dealing with snow in sneakers.



  • that’s fine, give me the hammer. I despise this increasingly pervasive online first mentality. I like native applications using native toolkits. They’re installed on my machine for a reason. I don’t want the clusterfuck of HTML, CAS, and JavaScript managing my interfaces; they’re horrible. Just because a monkey eating pop rocks can piss out a Pollock doesn’t mean i wanna buy it. I am absolutely willing to trade some UI/UX niceties for actual fucking applications.


  • My brother in Christ, im sorry to inform you but the upcoming fiscal crisis are gonna be some of the least of your kids worries. I’m still probably closer in age to you rather than them, but i grew up knowing that money is gonna mean jack shit once the water starts boiling (metaphorically, but hyperbolically realistic). We’re the frogs in the pot and the economy is gonna be the least of our troubles. We’re seeing a global rise in fascism, climate disasters, war, inequity, and yes financial instability. If you wanna help your kids, get involved in the community and organize. Start unions at your work places and march in protests for a better future. I’m not talking about a stronger or more fashy future, but one where we work together. Join or make mutual aid networks where you live. The best thing you can do for your children (imo, coming from a young person) is help set up the future you want for them. I would hope that’s one of community and mutual aid where we help each other not because we expect a reward or are paid to, but because together we stand taller and can hoist up those who cannot stand on their own. I hope i don’t sound too preachy, but it sounds like you love your kids so I implore you to get involved further. The future did not look kind to me when I was a child, and it looks even less hospitable now. We can change that. Direct action and mutual aid are the way forward to a better future imo.