A couple billion years from our point of view.

Dude doing the programming hasn’t even left for lunch yet.

I’ll check it out. Thank you.

I found a neat little workaround that I used for a while. I’d load the video up in my browser, turn the phone on an off a couple times, press play on the lock screen, and enjoy it that way.

Edit:

Still works. Just gotta full screen the video and then power off before it kills picture in picture.

And now I’m listening in the background as I type this.

I need a bird who can record a Commodore 64 tape for me. :p That’s what I want.

I have somehow avoided Amazon all these years. It’s easy for me, nothing I require is connected to Amazon.

I’m sure there are aspects of the business that I can’t avoid that I don’t even know I’m being dragged into, but I don’t spend my money with them.

Anytime I can’t find something somewhere else, I just move on and forget about it.

The only times I’ve ever been bummed about it is when I’m working on some small project and the parts are half the price on Amazon. Most recently, it was parts for an arcade machine.

If I’m being inconvenienced, I don’t even know it.

I walked away originally when they acquired cdnow.com. I last visited the site when it began redirecting to Amazon.

You don’t understand actual honest to god hermits then.

My wisdom tooth is going to kill me because I’d rather die than have someone touch me. I’m not kidding.

I went and had a pile of kids so I have to do it everyday. Oh my god I’m tired.

And what was I thinking?

Well, yeah, you can call it “paused” if you want to. The cruise control definitely stays on though and resumes the set speed when you stop accelerating. It completely disengages when you brake though, so I’ve never thought of it as turning off when I accelerate, only when braking.

I’ve never had one that turns it off if I accelerate.

They’ve all shut off if I tapped the brakes though.

I can’t imagine having something like this.

You know what kind of couples I have known who use it?

Yep. That kind. The constant accusation, constant fighting, constant chaos kind. The same kind who share a Facebook account and all that.

I guess my bias there would be that those would also be the kind of people who advertise it.

I was standing beside an old coworker one time when her husband called, “babe, don’t freak out when I start moving. The boss is sending me to harbor freight to pick up some things.”

I got a call from her in the middle of the night one time, “I’m sitting by the lake and I’m about to drive my car in and kill myself.”

She knew her husband didn’t like me so she thought I wouldn’t call him. Well, I called him. “That bitch is lying. Life 360 has her sitting at her mom’s house right now. She just fucking wants attention!”

Still, I called a friend and asked them to drive by and see. Yep. She was at her mom’s house.

Over 30k in donations so far.

What consequences? Some other Nazi will give him a job pretty quickly.

I remember when idiots would walk outside and shout their idiocy to the world and we’d say, “GO BACK IN YOUR FUCKING HOUSE HAROLD! You’re embarrassing the entire neighborhood!”

He’d sulk back into his living room and cuss, but he’d realize he was alone in his idiocy and he’d shut the fuck up.

Nowadays, Nazi Harold goes back in and finds 50,000 other idiots to validate his idiocy online and reinforce his asinine beliefs.

We live in a time when absurdity is a click away from being totally normal.

That is fucking dangerous, but what do you do?

He’ll be selling supplements for Heil Healthier in a few days.

Yeah I don’t usually get pissed, I’m just perpetually baffled.

I really don’t feel like I should be. I mean, physically I guess I do. My back is always hurting.

I wish I could smack it into younger people to do the fucking things that they want to do. They’ll blink their eyes and the world will be belong to the next bunch.

What’s funny to me is I grew up on gen x music and I remember looking up to those guys so much. They all looked like grown folks to me.

Now when I watch the videos, I see kids. It’s crazy.

This is a relatively new thing for me too.

Yeah I’d say. I’m older now and things that would have killed me in my 20s don’t mean a damn thing now. Even if something does bother me, it just is what it is.

I don’t know. We get what we get. I’m crosseyed, can’t do anything about that. It used to bother me but it doesn’t anymore. The hair I do have is turning gray.

Whatever we get, we just gotta live with it. :p

Not only am I blessed to have a full head of hair, but my younger brother has always been so much more handsome than me. Girls clawed to get to him, they fought to get to him.

It was so funny the other night when I was on a video call with him and his wife, and I don’t even remember the comment that I made, but she pointed out that he was bald, and I had a full head of hair and I nearly lost it.

I’m sorry that probably hurts you. It’s just a win for me, it was always so fucking easy for him. Now he’s bald and mad about it, and here I am with a beautiful lion’s mane.

He could read this comment easily, he knows all of my usernames and shit online.

So hey, I have a full head of hair asshole. Where’s your hair?

It’s so crazy though, everything I ever did, he did it better. Just across the board entirely. Still to this day, shit I busted my ass on for 25 years. He’s doing it better with no effort.

So all I really have is my hair. He has it all, the lucky bastard. It’s only right that he went bald. Nobody should be able to have it all.

Lucky! :p

Seeing “old millennial ass” just seems so wrong.

We’re the young generation, right? We’re like, 25 at most. Right?

I’m 40. Oh my god. I need a Camaro and a broccoli haircut so I can fit in with the hip crowd. Broccoli hair is still a thing right? Haha

Man it goes so fast.

You sir, are not the world’s dumbest man. I doubt I am either, but I would bet I’m dumber than you.

We should fight about it.

Very bold…atlas.