Before my first birthday after we met I had told my now husband that I wanted to switch to reusable pads. I showed him a brand I had in mind, but they cost 20€ per pad. That birthday I got a 200€ gift card for the pads so I could buy myself a starter pack. I don’t know what I loved more, the fact that he was so thoughtful or how he proved that he wasn’t one of those guys who get weird when the topic of periods comes up.
On my 5th birthday my parents threw a party for me with friends from kindergarten. My father had a pretty good camera for the time and loved taking photos. This was during analog times, way before digital cameras, so you wouldn’t just take a bunch of photos because it got expensive. He wanted to take a group photo and I, always being a little annoyed back then with the constant photos, stuck out my tongue. He tried to make me smile but I refused. So he told me he’d take the photo of me sticking out my tongue and I’d regret it when I’m an adult that I don’t have a nice photo of me on my 5th birthday. I’m 40 and I don’t regret it. Love that photo.
I started Escitalopram 4 weeks ago. Not motivated for anything yet and my brain still feels like it’s filled with cotton, but I can at least sleep again and don’t panic about every small thing anymore.
Spring has begun
When I was in third or fourth grade, we had to take a swimming test for a badge in sports class. Basically you had to prove you can swim for a certain time, jump into the water and dive. If you got the badge, you could attach it to your swim suit to show you can swim in deep water.
I had no problem with the swimming and jumping, but then came the diving. The poolwater was heavily clorinated and it hurt my eyes. I usually wore goggles, however the teacher decided that we weren’t allowed goggles for the test. We had to dive for a ring. I remember being above the ring, going down, but then I couldn’t find it. Due to the chlorine I couldn’t open my eyes and I searched the ground with my hands. Eventually I was out of breath and had to go up again. The teacher said that I had failed the test because I couldn’t bring the ring back up, even though it was clear that I was able to dive and stay under water for a long time. I never got that badge. I’m not sure why, I think I could have redone the test in a swimming class outside of school, but my parents never cared to sign me up because ultimately the badge wasn’t that important.
I’m still a bit mad because I feel like I should have been allowed goggles in such a heavily chlorinated pool.
I’m 40 (1985). I’ve had my experiences with older guys hitting on me when I was your age. I can tell you that, in my experience, the reason why men like that won’t date in their own age group is because women their age see the red flags more clearly or won’t put up with their bullshit.
Here are some things he might do to look out for: Does he try to impress you with things that are achievements for your age group but should be normal for his? Having a car, having their own apartment, having money to take you out etc. Maybe he’ll offer to drive you places or stay at his place to get away from your parents.
Does he comment a lot on your age and experience level. Things like “Have you already done (alcohol, sex…)”, “I’ve done XYZ, but you wouldn’t know about it”. Or does he act overly impressed by you ‘already’ knowing something, like music from his teenage years, having a job or just some common knowledge he thinks is “adult”, maybe about cars or jobs. Basically, does he act like you are special, more mature for your age or does he talk about your age a lot.
Even if he doesn’t do any of these things, I’d advice you against it. The age gap is too big. The world of an 18 year old who just got out of school is just very different from a 33 year old who is working a job. Having a few hobbies or music taste in common isn’t the same as being in the same place in life.
Everyone complains about it being empty and not many want to do anything about it. I’m not sure if this is even because of the user number, because I’ve been on forums with just a few users that were very active. It often seems like too many people here are waiting for a large influx of users so that others can do the posting. Also people try waaaay too hard to copy Reddit 1:1. They have this one very specific community with certain content and try to copy it here. If there was a subreddit for a 1998 version of an obscure computer game, they want this very same community to exist here. Instead of discussing said game in a more general community.
Met my husband on an event and we immediately got along great. We met up the next day for coffee, which turned into a 4 hour date, and I had the hugest crush on him. He came by my apartment five days later and we talked for hours, kissed, and he asked me to be his girlfriend. So about a week from first meeting to getting together. I think I told him I’ll marry him one day after a month or so. We’ve been together for 8 1/2 years now.
I don’t think the kids thought that far. I certainly didn’t.
In my elementary school there was a rumour that kissing someone on the mouth makes a baby in the throat. I’ve heard it still being spread years later. There are also parodies of famous German poems that you have or had to memorize in school, although I some kids learnt them from their parents. I know parody versions of Die Glocke and Die Bürgschaft.
There are rules to handle foreign names in a language with declinsion. I don’t see why you can’t use those.
Besides, most inflected languages I know will handle names differently from other nouns. Definitely true in German, but also Italian. E.g. you say “Faccio una foto del duomo.” (I’m taking a picture of the dome.) but “Faccio una foto di Mike.” (I’m taking a picture of Mike.)
The only language where this doesn’t work that I know of would be Latin, which is why people in the past latinized names.
We never had different names in language classes and the idea is so weird to me. My name is my name, I don’t introduce myself with a different name when I go to Italy or Spain.
“—and is still waiting for dual citizenship”
Aaand you can stop reading here.
Dual citizenship isn’t a thing (anymore) in Germany. That is to say, you can only get it if you can prove, that it’s almost impossible to give up your original citizenship. That isn’t the case for US Americans.
“Barbara W. does not want to have to choose. She wants German citizenship—without giving up her American one.”
Yeah, well, but then she just can’t have German citizenship. Yes it sucks, yes it would be nice if dual citizenship was easier, but this is the law currently. Dual citizenship is the exception in Germany. If she wants German citizenship, she has to give up the American one.
Besides, her reason is a bit weird. She wants to keep her American citizenship in memory of her father. I mean, for me citizenship is mostly bureaucracy and if you live in a country for years what good is it to also keep your old citizenship? Staying a citizen of a country you haven’t lived in for decades seems unnecessary.
About two days without food, a bit more if I remember correctly, and around one day without water.
I had to have a knee surgery with general anesthesia, so I wasn’t allowed to eat several hours before and couldn’t drink either. Due to the timing of the surgery the last time I would have been allowed to drink was like 1 am, but I’m a morning person and was anxious so I went to bed at my normal 10pm and also ate and drank at my normal 7-8pm or so. Or maybe I had to stop eating earlier, I don’t remember exactly.
Anyway, the surgery happened, my parents picked me up and took me home. My mother had one of her many many meltdowns. They hadn’t brought me snacks or drinks to the hospital and she just mocked me that I couldn’t hold it together for the 1 hour ride home. We get home, I hobbled to my bed. My mother refused to bring me food or drinks and forbid my father from bringing me anything. I could come to the kitchen and sit at the table “like a normal person” if I wanted to eat. In the evening my spineles POS father at least brought me a bottle of water, much to my mother’s dismay.
The next day I managed to hobble to the table, so I was allowed to eat and drink.
This wasn’t entirely new, my parents had a habit of locking me up in my room without food or water for an entire day when I was little. They never thought that was a big deal. My mother even told me after the surgery that she wouldn’t bring me food to not “enable my spoiled behaviour” and that it was a good chance to finally lose some weight. (I was just slightly overweight, maybe 80kg at 172).
In case you’re wondering: yes, I’ve been no contact with my family for years.
Never. I have a very rare first Name and the combination with my last Name is unique. I also have cut contact with my abusive family so I don’t want them to find me.
My husband is in my phone with a nickname of his old name. He took on a new name from our culture when he became a naturalized citizen, but I never changed it and he doesn’t mind.
I was in his phone as “[my name] from café X”, until he got a new phone last year. The first thing he did was take me on a date to a new café and proudly enter my number into his new phone as “[my name] from café Y”.
I find it worse when the sexual tension just keeps on going and goes nowhere. I really liked for example that they didn’t do that in Kim Possible. They let Kim and Ron become a couple and made new stories about how they work out as a couple. It’s been a while since I’ve watched it, but I remember appreciating that they could just be together instead of some will-they-won’t-they bullshit.
I’ve defintely stopped reading the comic universes because it gets too much. You can’t just grab a new issue and read it anymore. Doesn’t matter whether marvel or DC. Every comic is connect to 20 other comics and you need to read Deadpool, Dr Strange and 10 others in order to have the back story of one Spiderman issue. When I read comics it’s the independent artists that can finish a story within one or two volumes. Same goes for SciFi and Fantasy novels. Too many SciFi novels out there that are this epic 20 volume complex world building saga. Just give me a story that is finished in one book.
Also knitting. Good yarn has become so expensive.